Micky Sedota's Writing Portfolio

Writing Break, Day Won

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Writing break from reading.

Kerouac, On the Road. 

But now that I am here I don’t know what I wanted to say. Just wanted to type, I guess. 

It’s important to take breaks because I will get fixated on one thing and go go go…and yes it is productive to read but. There is other shit to do. I continue never to prioritize. Just move in the direction of the sun. Is this enough? I am not a reptile. 

This is a check-in. It’s the beginning of the middle of the day and that means food. Salad? Pizza?

I must make calls but I crave reading books in the sun. The sun will not last after 2 PM. Three more delicious hours. Will I think of my day as a success if I make it out there that long, reading, eating, writing, yoga, and then come back inside and look more at the laptop?

Pizza.

My heart rate slows, my anxiety recedes.

The mental effort I put into (obsessing?) worrying about how I will be perceived at the bar or church or whatever might be misplaced and better suited for art. I am not stressed about being accepted as a human as much as I am not sure the function of my character in any given social situation. I am an aspired ____; failed and now in sales. No. 

I am more than that, and everyone can relate to that feeling of being relegated to a familiar storyline so that others can make sense of them, only to find they are unable to be perceived for who they truly are. The freedom from that box may be earned in the art of conversation, but art takes place in many forms. 

Yoga at 2. 

I came into the office today. Not the office for the job, my office for my work. 

I am implementing my plan. I am laying down a routine. Day one. Day Won.

Why is it so difficult to begin?

I did a new thing. A new old thing. I washed my face and brushed my teeth and put in earrings and changed into day clothes (just different pj’s you can’t see through) and unrolled my mat and stretched. From half-lotus I reached my right arm over the left side of my body and activated my bandhas and felt a ripple of freedom cracking my vertebrae one at a time up the right side – released. 

It’s taking me a long time to sit down because this is a new space that needs to be established, both in my body and in my home. Like setting up camp on day one. Day Won. 

[…the birds ring for us to remember they still rule the land…]